Friday, November 4, 2011

The Woman i Admire Part-3 Swara Bhaskar


Sawara Bhaskar-I saw her in the movie TANU weds MANU in which she is play's the supporting role of a friend to Kangana Ranaut. From the start itself i was impressed by her, just amazing, the way she communicates with a Bihari accent and comes across a strong personality being clear in what she wants really made me like her.
 Further Research on her revealed amazing facts, a bachelors in English Literature from Delhi University and a Masters in Sociology from Jawaharlal Nehru University and then an almost finalized plan to go for Phd from US. So much for her Intellect.

She has also starred in two other movies known as Niyati and Madholal keep walking. Both movies have a strong woman oriented role in which she is playing the protagonist.
Smart, Sensual, dusky, intellectual and highly cerebral she comes across as a girl next door and certainly a dream girl of a thinking and intellectual man.

Swara i just find you amazing, you may not be Katrina Kaif or Kareena Kapoor or any of the candy floss girls who comes in Bollywood and have no reality. You are a real person and you remain what you are. I wish you all the best for your future and hope you find the success you deserve.

I wish that one day i come across someone of your type.

Monday, October 31, 2011

Being an Outcast in the Indian Society-The Life of a Homeless Destitute Orphan

OUTCAST, Hmmmmmmm what did this really mean, an online dictionary search yielded the following result:

1. a person who is rejected or excluded from a social group
2. a vagabond or wanderer
3. anything thrown out or rejected
rejected, abandoned, or discarded; cast out
Who really are the outcasts of the Indian Society?Well,  I i would say that they are Orphans, Homeless Destituites, Divorcees, widows, members belonging to the Minority Community( I don't need to emphasize which one!!!), mentally and physically handicapped people.

From all of them, i fall under the first and second category, PLEASE!!! don't get the feeling that i am trying to get any sympathy from you. I am just expressing my feelings on what i face in my daily life.

Day by day as i get older i start wondering where is my life taking me to. Why am i not able to live a normal life, agreed that i may be alone, but i am not lonely as i keep myself busy with a lot of things.But then, why is it that i always feel that somewhere there is a void???

Every time when people ask me about my parents, i am on second thoughts of what  i should say.What will be the reaction of people be when i tell them the truth?? I have no answer to this.

Almost all my friends/colleagues are married and are busy with their family life. i can't go and spend my time with them. I spend my evenings and nights alone.

Every time i have fill a form where the space of parents/dependents have to be filled i don't know what to do, many a times i fill it as blank/not there/expired. And each time the person assessing my from looks at me in a strange manner and asks me , your parents are not there??? why?? what happened?? how did it happen?? Who took care of you?? How did you manage your education??

You try to forget  your past but such nosy people  keep on reminding you of the incidents that happened in your life.

You search for a job and and eventually get it, but there again a personal question is asked, what about your family???? Again the same question, i am in a catch 22 situation, i tell them the truth and my chances of getting the job are 0%, i tell them lies and the chances are 100%. At times i would like to ask these Corporate HR people who think so strategically and laterally, that what is the significance of  of a candidates personal life?? , Of having or not having a family??? No ,you cannot answer this question, its not your fault , it is the fault of this Indian Society that has cultivated this Mindset in your Head and even your so called B-School Education has not given you any wisdom.

I search for a place to stay, every flat owner detests me, why?? Well, because i am single and unmarried and of course old. I am looked upon by suspicion. Even if i get to stay, i get the feeling that i am being distanced, i am considered a threat to the married wives of the other members staying in the building, a threat to the father of every young daughter, a threat to the small child of every parent.This society brands me as a would be rapist and pedophile and if that is not enough Gay and mentally disturbed psycho.

When people come to know about my real condition, except for a few good Samaritans who help me, the majority wants to take advantage of me and exploit me. I am made to sit and do extra work after office hours,called on Holidays and my leaves are not sanctioned. Common reasons given " You can work , you don't have a family and whom are you going to go back to, what will you do by sitting at home, better sit and spend your time in the office" And i would like to ask these "BA@$#%^S" is that, am i not a human being???, can't i have a life of my own???

I don't have any beneficiary in my blood line whom i can nominate for life insurance policies or for whatever small amount i have, again i am left to think whom can i nominate. Some heartless people ask me " What are you going to do with the money that you earn?" " After you, no one is going to get the money, better give it to us" so easily said, but do these people realize what shattering effect it has on me, that i am reminded of being an orphan.

My own birthday and festivals have just become another date in the monthly calender. While every family enjoys the birthday's of their loved ones and celebrate festivals together, i do nothing and i am not invited by by them to be a part of their celebration, Reasons!!! I leave it up to them to answer.
No one ,bearing a few, invite me to marriage functions or ceremonies of theirs or their near and dear ones. After all couples and families give a glow to the marriage ceremony and reception, what does me a single fellow have to add to it, i am just considered as an obsolete waste scrap who is better off discarded from the guest's list.

And then comes the final part , MARRIAGE, everyone in India has become a self styled counselor on the subject of marriage, right from newly married young couples to septuagenarian senior citizens, every one advises " GET MARRIED" in unison  stating that it is some type of universal antidote to any problem in this world, even if their own marriages have been disasters.

Having no one to connect and meet in the Indian social network in the community and society , I resort to the online matrimonial sites thinking that I may meet some broad minded cosmopolitan people, but I am mistaken, all the divisions of the Indian Society are openly demarcated on these sites. But then also, not loosing hope i try, i meet girls, at first they seem positive, they read my profile and the very point of not having parents offends them, or should i say their controller/Handlers,  after all they are not the ones doing all this profiling and searching, it is either their parent's or their married siblings who are doing it. Everywhere i face rejections and even if the meeting does take place, no one responds back or even gives a feedback of the meeting. And yes, i do get interests, girls who are the filtered members of of the Society whom no normal guy will even care to spit (Shit) on (please excuse my language),divorcees, double divorcees, widowers, woman with all kinds of problems, woman having severe health problems like Type 1 Diabetes and in some cases even HIV+ cases, physically and mentally handicapped woman, obese woman ,so obese that they pass of as the daughters of Japanese sumo fighters". From these ,i try to meet the divorcees and widowers, thinking that after going through tragic events they may understand me, but no, i am mistaken, expectations remain the same, they want the same things that they had in their first marriage and once again i am rejected. I am not sad , it is life. Every Daughter's father looks on me with suspicion, every time the same question is asked, whats your salary? What is your bank balance?? Who represents you as a family?? Who will take care of our daughter if something happens to you" "Do you have a House" " Where do you plan to keep my daughter"?? I feel that i am not interviewed by a prospective future father-in-law but INTERROGATED by Senior Officer of an Intelligence Service.

My education, looks, my integrity , character, nature does not count, in this very Indian Society the most ugliest, physically dis morphed, morbidly obese, foul stinking men with an odour that even will put a skunk to shame, pathological liars, woman beaters, sex maniacs get married , yes sir , they get married and not just to anyone, but to the woman of their choice, just because they have a family, what turns out five years later is another story but this is the truth at present.

No sir, I am not that desperate  to get married, I can live my life alone, I am not a biomedical waste garbage can where every Indian father for whom his daughter has become a biomedical waste and wants to get rid of her can come and dispose her to me. No, i am not that garbage can and neither am i going to beg with my hand open, like some desperate loner.

This what i go through my dear friends. What crime have i done if i don't have a family or parents?? Is it a crime to be a Homeless EDUCATED Professional man in this country??? Is it my fault that I am today a HOMELESS DESTITUTE ORPHAN??? Why do i have to be stigmatized over and over again?

I have no answers to this, i know that there is very little way (if there is ) that i will be able to make my way in the Indian Society.And i very well know that maybe in another 7 or 10 years from now i will have to leave this country if i want to see myself happy.

Sunday, October 30, 2011

Bob Christo-Tribute to a Man who lived his life Kingsize

Last Week i has just finished reading the Autobiography of Veteran Bollywood Actor Bob Christo, the same actor who always essayed the Role the GORA FIRANGI Villain in Bollywood movies in the decade of late 70's, 80's and 90's. His book Flash back-My life and Times in Bollywood where he has penned down his experiences is a good read. This book really got me thinking so let me share thoughts

Very little is Know about this man, but we do remember him for all the Western Roles he played in Bollywood Movies, and the fact that in spite of being a Foreigner he spoke Hindi quite fluently though with an Accent which was always be his Hall Mark. Many you who are still not aware of this man whodied on 20 march 2011 this year in Bangalore.

Born in Australia, he was a man of different trades. who acted in almost 200 Movies in Bollywood and noted critically acclaimed Television Serials like Tipu Sultan and the Great Maratha.

His zest for adventure took him all over the World. Qualified as a Civil Engineer, he worked in South Vietnam as a Contract for the US Military at the Height of the Vietnam War, did a small role as a Stuntman for the Movie Apocalypse, even worked as a Mercenary fore Hire along with the British Army Special Forces the SAS(Special Airborne Service) fighting the Russian Communists in Rhodesia now Zimbabwe and a male Escort in South Africa.

A sudden turn of Events and a desire to meet Actress Parveen Babi , brought him to India. His subsequent Friendship with Actor and Producer Sanjay Khan and his casting into his first film "Abdullah" paved his way into Bollywood.

Bob Christo lived his life and when i say lived his life, i literally mean "LIVED HIS LIFE", in his book he has not hidden any incident and has been very transparent ,openly mention about the woman in his life, his affairs and breakups.

Like very Human Being he also had to wrestle with his own demons and had to reinvent himself to become Bollywood's most prolific villain. And yes he did work hard for it, studying the script, knowing the character and of course mastering Hindi (something that today's new 2nd Generation NRI's still can't do and want to make their career's in Bollwod just by shaking Hips and Butts, ARE you listening, My dear Katrina Kaif)

A true fitness freak who actively took up strength training, Yoga and meditation and not to forget, Water Sports Seriously as he always felt that one should remain fit for life and led by example.

He also taught water sports to children of many Bollywood actor's.

His life conveys a simple message, that you don't get to live twice, you get one life so please live it happily. We Indian's should learn something from this man, many of us live a life of burden weighed down by unnecessary responsibilities. If i would like to conjure the image of a typical Indian Man, it would be that of Jesus Christ, when he was chained to the Heavy Cross and made to walk a long distance to the final site of persecution. This is the life of many Indians.

Skeptics and staunch supporters of the so called VALUES OF THE INDIAN SOCIETY many say, what is there to learn from this foreigner, after all, all he did was to have booze and sex with different woman, he is a threat to the Indian Society and Indian culture. Oh Dear!!! That's all these guys can say, they want everything but when they don't get it, they somehow form a resistant mindset just like how the fox had formed in the little bed time story of the Sour Grapes, when he could not reach it owing to the Height of the Grapes.

This book is about learning, learning about life about faith and the path to redemption.

Highly recommended for the youngsters especially those in their 20' and 30' and also for all those Indian who have been carrying the Cross of Crucifixion all their life

A statement from the book, Bob Christo Growlingly asked Tom Alter, " Tom, why don't they (the Bollywood directors) give me romantic roles" and the answer he got from Tom Alter was " The truth my friend is that your life has been the most romantic role of all"

In the end of the book, Bob makes a statement:

"As i look back there were happy times and sad times like in every life, but it was a life fully lived"


Saturday, October 29, 2011

The Case of Metallica Show Being Cancelled and Hooliganism Followed after that

Fans of U.S. band Metallica vandalise the stage after the concert was postponed in Gurgaon, on Friday. The maiden concert of Metallica, which was earlier postponed to Saturday, was cancelled.

This openly signifies two things, one, that Customer Service has gone for a toss. If a company like DNA had made advanced bookings by taking a huge load of cash from the public, they should have put in their best to hold the show, after all people had invested their valuable time and money for this show. Also think about the cost of traveling that many people have put in to reach gurgaon from various parts of India. At least the DNA group should have properly communicated to the customers on why the show is being postponed. Just by refunding the money you are not solving the Matter.

The second is that the sheer hooliganism shown by our Indian Brothers and Sisters is Pathetic, given that the show was cancelled or postponed, was it necessary to get involved in such a violent act. Otherwise also the Western Media and the people in General don't have any good impression of us Indians. We are know for lack of public manners and this has been repeated by our Desi Travelers who go on their FOREN Trips, by our over educated techies who's EDUCATION is limited on to their profession, but when it comes to public manners and decency it is zero and last but not the least our useless politicians, all this has not made a good impression of India in the Western World.

And you my dear friends have added one more word in the Minds of the Western people, that we Indian are Hooligans. It has given the Western Media and other International press agencies a vantage point to throw Mud of us. It is because of such idiotic acts of few Indian like you, the entire Indian community will be labelled as Hooligans.

At least learn to maintain the Honour of your own Country

The Desperate late Twenties and Early Thirties Indian Woman

Some time back i had watched the movie, TURNING 30 starred by Ms Gul Panang as the protagonist, it was an amazing movie.

However one point the movie did highlight was the desperation of a Woman who hitting her thirties to settle down.This true for all the woman who are in their late 20's and early 30's. in India.

They may deny it in however form they want to but the urge to settle down for these woman who are climbing up the career ladder is always there. Now what can be the reason for this???

First of course is the personal urge, your hormones like progesterone and estrogen does have a way to act on your mind at this age, also the fact that they see a lot of happy woman holding arms of their hubbies and playing with their children makes them also long for a full time relationship, after all which woman would not want constant love and affection. Woman being woman are constantly bombarded with information of love and affection either in those candy floss novels or Romantic sit coms  or romantic Hollywood/Bollywood movies.

Second of course is the so called PRESSURE from the Indian Society. Now of course this is something that even the most tenacious and determined woman would find it difficult to handle.Not getting married at the approved age of the Indian society which is as per statistics extended to twenty five does raise a lot of Questions in the Mind of a lot people, commonly among the Old Retired Uncles and Nosy Old hag Aunties and of course some middle aged and young married people who have taken it onto themselves to defend the Morals of the Indian Society.

The second factor becomes a major thrust of desperation for woman in the late 20's and early 30's age bracket group to start finding a suitable match ASAP. Because if they don't the society starts treating them as an out caste, a pariah, a person who is having some problem and last but not the least a characterless woman.

And the society makes their living difficult, moment they step of their apartments, eyes are turned on them, "See she is 29 and still not married" "I wonder if he will ever get married" "Hmmm this girl has high expectations and she is career oriented, which normal guy will marry her" "She is cheap woman, i saw her flirting with one guy yesterday" "She is spoiling our society, because after looking at her even my 23 year old daughter is post-ponding marriage by giving the example of her life"

These are the comments spoken by our good for nothing out of work nosy people. And if that is not enough some people are shameless enough so openly confront single woman and bluntly ask them , "When are we going to hear the good news" ,"Abhi nahi to phir kabi, ummar nikal gai to ladka nahi milega", "Is there some problem" Poor woman and her parents are never spared of such idiotic question.

More stigma is also faces by the girl's parents, everywhere they go, they are ridiculed with the same questions. They gradually find it difficult to answer such questions and vent their frustration on their poor daughters.

And then either because of personal needs or society pressure one commonly finds these woman desperately looking out for a groom to tie a knot, just to escape from the stigma of the society or to make their parents happy, not knowing that they are going to make the biggest mistakes of their lives.

And of course some woman driven by desperation get so clingy to the guy they meet that they literally drive them away due to their over attached behavior.

I wonder when the Indian Society will accept people for for just what they are, when will they realize that singlw woman are happier and being alone does not mean being lonely, that just because your daughters got married at a ripe age, it does not mean that everyone has to follow the suit.

My suggestion is woman is don't buckle under the pressure of society and wait till you find your perfect match, beacuse the most profound relation that one can have is always with Himself/Herself.

Friday, October 28, 2011

The Jobless and Out of Work Media in our Country

Many a times i come across news where the woman is beating her husband who has cheated on her and following her are a swarm of Media Personnel along with their camera trying to cover it as if it was some kind of breaking news.

Please find the Photos given below:

I mean cheating and adultery is a personal matter, is it necessary that media should be called in to cover the incident?? Imagine the poor Husband being beaten to pulp without any mercy and no one stopping him. Looks like viewing domestic violence has become a national pastime.

And the reason why some media houses show this is simple , it feeds the hunger of our viewers. We watch nothing other than stupid idiotic cricket matches and of course their reviews and replays, stupid family oriented soaps and replays of worthless Bollywood movies which certainly does not make any sense to us and when that is not enough we end up seeing real cases of wife and husband domestic violence because it triggers the adrenaline rush in our body.

This is the typical Indian Society , no matter how much we say that we have progressed on the professional front we remain primitive in our thinking. We are just so nosy that we are bothered with what happens in other people's house , creative and intellectual development in our society has gone for a toss.

And coupled with that you have media houses especially the Hindi and regional news channels who have nothing else to do but cover cases of Adultery and domestic violence. I mean if a Husband has removed his wife from her home, then that becomes National News, my request is that please cover on some good topics, like how a person who came up in spite of facing severe adversities, stories that inspire masses and make us think laterally out of the box.

Please cover that and not such bullshit

Wednesday, October 26, 2011

Materialism that has crept into the Great Institution of Marriage

Please read an excerpt below taken from a profile of a Female Candidate in Most Amazing read, shows her greed and her desire to settle down in foreign country by trading her self in Marriage.

 "Hello i am pooja. by nature i am a very simple, soft spoken and emotional girl.. i like watching movie, shopping and enjoy music.. i belong to a middle class family. i don't have a father so i live in kolkata with my mother and mamas.. i very often go for dinning with friend.. i am known as dumb amongst my friend.. I am looking for an NRI guy from UK or USA. He should be well settle must have a good family background.. I am looking for a sikh punjabi guy (but he should not have a turban) he must be handsome with a good personality.. the guy should be far away from any kind of addiction.. i don"t mind him drinking occasionally.. he should be well educated. he has to take care of my mother after our marriage.. he should take me immediately with him after our marriage.. he must be a down to earth person.. possess a simple nature and should give respect to elders. The guy preferbly should be from a joint family.. I want to get married to a punjabi sikh guy coz i a really like their rich tradition and culture.. i would like to upload my picture and would even like to see the picture of the guy as well.. I want to get married to an NRI coz i have been twice to UK london i really like that place alot wish to spend my life abroad with a loving and caring husband.. to me marriage means a beautiful bounding of love and care where not only the bride and groom gets connected but the entire family are bounded togather into one big family.. hope you"ll at shaadi. com will find me a nice matching soon.. I would like to get knotted by this year 2011 december.. Thanks and regards Pooja wish to hear from you"ll soon.

And all the Elderly men/uncles and Old Hag Aunties say that marriage is a pious institution where there is continuous love and sacrifice. I only have one statement, "BALLS to you and you stupid idiotic obsolete thoughts which have no relevance in the 21 st century"  

Monday, October 24, 2011

Cardiovascular Exercises

In graduation i had just read about Cardiovascular Aerobic Exercises. But i am feeling its effects only after doing it. Amazing!!!!! The way it cools you down and leads to stress reduction. I really feel energetic after that. I have just started swimming, from tomorrow onwards i shall start jogging and running as well.

Gradually i shall increase the intensity and increase my endurance. My motto is very simple,

STAY FIT FOR LIFE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Sunday, October 23, 2011

The case of the Arrogant Cook-Part 2

Same thing repeated today , first of all he made the lunch quite late and then it was nothing but shit , which would not even go properly through my digestive tract. I just hated this guy from the core. He deserves to be shown no mercy.

A third rated scoundrel of the first order. I just wish that your presently pregnant wife has a still born birth and your wife dies at the time of birth itself. I curse you from my heart you scoundrel and may you face hell all your life.

Saturday, October 22, 2011

The case of the Arrogant Cook

How can i relate this. Had come after a nice swim. Was waiting for the breakfast to come up, but it was delayed. We have an idiotic and senseless nepali cook who thinks that he is the owner of the House. Just on casually asking him if he could make the breakfast early he started talking arrogantly stating that he was in a bad mood and he would do things when he wanted.

Though i have a lot of respect of Nepali's this idiot strikes as an odd man out. He thinks that he can hold anyone at ransom and do as he pleases. The fault to some extent is not his but of the High Society which has elevated these idiots to such a High Levels. The Patel's Shah"s, Mehta's and other rich guys having flashy surnames have become so dependent on them that they cannot do without these servants. IF given the requirement, they would even have their Asses wiped by these class 4 category workers.However due to personal privacy problems it cannot be done.

And now i realize why these servants remain as servants all their life, because they never rise above this shit Mentality that they have formed. They start thinking that they are invincible and cannot be replaced. They don't go any further ahead in life and rise above from being a cook or driver or whatever slave like job they do. Who can explain and give wisdom to these idiots. Amazing thing is that this guy's wife is pregnant , he soon will have a child and he thinks that even if he does not have a job he will remain some sort of self made king.

Horrible creature and i hope the lord has a way of fixing you and making you more sober. i used to feel sympathetic towards him initially , but now even if he is facing the worst in life i shall not help him.

Saturday, June 4, 2011


At times I feel that that for a decade I have been under the obligation of someone or the other. Someone  has  obliged me by giving me money, someone by giving me food, someone by a home to stay and someone has either given me a job or save me from trouble either in professional or personal life and at times people have told me on my face that they are doing a  big favor by obliging me. My  self-respect and alter ego has been compromised at times because I am in some way  I am indebted to them.
I remember that when I came back to India on 21st Dec 2010, I did not even have a place to go back to, not even a home, no one to welcome me warmheartedly. At this point I felt that I had become a refugee in my very own country similar to the Kashmiri Hindu pundits who had to leave the valley in the 90’s.
I have made some promises to myself and have made it very clear that never again I shall be under anyone’s obligation, not even for a single penny. In the 3 to 4 years to come I want gain as much knowledge and insight into Healthcare Quality and Training  so as to become a star employee for any HR Recruiter or Head Hunter and on the personal front have a small home of my own under my name so as never in future I will ever be destitute, nothing can hurt me more that the fact that I am today a Homeless Orphaned Destitute. Destiny took away my sister and my parents and left me all alone in this world, I did not complain, with time my wound healed.
But what happened then was out of my control what happens now is in my control and I shall see to it that I try to make the best of my life.

Looks like the Tipping Point Has started

31st May 2011

It will always be a day to remember; we made a major breakthrough and got our association with the important doctors. Amazing, the patience of Kaul sir and Himanshu sir paid off, it was their relentless efforts that paid off. Amazing!!! Kaul sir had told me once that there would be a tipping point one day when rapid positive changes would occur and it seems that we heading for it.
Let’s hope that things suffice and we achieve our goals and one day IASO Solutions will reach the Zenith. Our hard work and dedication and the blessing of god will pay us off.

Saturday, May 28, 2011

The Visit made by Wd Cdr Arjun Sir

My boss, mentor, philosopher and flat mate made a visit to Ahmedabad last week. We recollected of our old days when we used to stay in Rushin Appartments in Anandnagar, Satellite, our working together at Shalby Hospitals, the ups and downs we had and today of course we both are working at good places. I will never forget Arjun sir, a true example of an Officer and a Gentleman.

My Birthday Celebrations- Turning 29

Well what can i say, i turned 29 on 13th May 2011, the last year of my 20' s and my enetering into the the 30's. It was good, with Hazel Madam bringing the cake and me cutting it with all my office colleagues. It made me feel Human, i don't know when was the last time i even celebrated by birthday, 13th may had just become another day. But it is okay, these celebrations will go for some years maybe another 3 or 4 and one day when i will pack up my bags and leave this place, 13th May again will become another day.

Monday, May 23, 2011

The Indian Marriage system is flawed

Strange but true, at times i have felt that marriage as an institution has failed at times. People don't want to give each other time. All the want is instant gratification, immediate marriage. People fail to understand that it takes time to know a person, to understand him/her, to know the likes and dislikes of one another.

Everyone wants instant results, like 2 minute noodles, which of course is not possible.

When will people be able to understand?? Just because you want to get things done fast , you cant expect others to do the same. Decisions of a lifetime cannot be taken in one or two months.

Monday, May 2, 2011

Ms CHARU SINHA- My Family, Gaurdian, Prtotector, Counselor and Mentor

There are times in your life when god sends a Samaritan who helps you in your times of distress and guides you wisely. Charu Sinha is one of them , it was in the year of 2006 that we had met in Hyderabad and our bonding has been so great and even after 5 years on we have a strong relation.

For a person like me who has had no one in this world  CHARU now is my family and i know that she is fiercely protective for me. There is a lot of contribution of hers in making me reach the position that i have today and charu is and will always be the final decision maker in some aspects of my life.

Why I love my individuality and love to remain Single all my life.

I just love my single status. The fact that as my age goes by my single status does not change. It remains the same. People or so called members of our Honourable Indian Society keep on asking, you are not married, why?? What is the reason? When can we expect the good news?? I feel like swearing the filthiest bad words to these people who can’t mind their business, these experts or so called self styled preachers who have taken to solve the problems of the Society.

I just love being single for the fact that I have a lot of freedom to do things my way. The ability to take decisions on my own, to live a life of my own, to pursue my passions, hobbies, going to places where I want. Of course the professional advantage is the ability to relocate; this helps me in winning brownie points in front of my employers.

I am accused, criticised that I am running away from commitments that I don’t have the ability to take up responsibility, that I am not a wasted failure on the personal front. These so called preachers with white/gray/black hair have nothing better to say.
I have seen it all; in the 29 years of my life I have seen this society from a close angle. There are people who are not fit to get married but they do, WHY?? Well ,maybe at a young age they were driven by testosterone/progesterone/oestrogen/pheromones, they fell is some stupid puppy love with each other only to realize that life was not a bliss after marriage, that things change, and they didn’t expect that to happen.

The other crowd gets married out of fear and repression of the Indian Society. These boys who still need their Moms to cook for them and wash their clothes, guys who have not even gone too the bathroom to take a piss without their parents permission. They may have achieved a lot professionally but  its of  no use , they are stuck in dead end jobs, with nothing to look ahead, their H1-B visa Status, Green card, or five or six figure salary is their gateway to a beautiful homely Indian girl who will be a prostitute for him in bed, a maid servant to wash his dirty stinking clothes and of course the Indian Homely girl for his parents and not to forget a trophy wife to shown off to his friends and last but not the least a second revenue earner. They guys get such girls also because in India even the most educated girls are threatened to get into this marriage alliance because such a marriage ensures stability.

Coming back to the topic of discussion, I want to say that a lot of people don’t discover themselves and it happens a lot in India. Let m give you a standard timetable set by the Indian Society for the youngsters:

Finish your education by the age of 22 or 23

Get a decent well paying job by 24

Work hard till 26

Start Searching a Bride (the same crap requirements of the Indian Society)

Get married by 26

ENJOY for 2 years ( In other terms have maximum sex with your wife for 2 years, ya, and even try out all the positions and fantasies which you saw in porn movies right from your adolescent age on your wife not even asking her or considering her emotions and feelings)

By 28 become a father- Because that’s the proof of your Manhood and a prized satisfaction for your parents as they become grandparents, old hags who could not handle one generation properly is now willing to take on the next)

And after that???? Start living a Mediocre life of an unworthy existence, stick to a mediocre job because it pays good, creativity and career development goes for a toss.
Come home and there are responsibilities to handle, social gatherings to go to and many more requirements to be fulfilled.

 Of course and I forgot, comparisons start, my wife is beautiful than your, his son/daughter scored more marks in the exam, our daughter is more gifted than your son. We have a bigger house than yours, our car is much better. This is how the society looks after marriage.

I have seen men change after marriage, once they were nice decent Samaritans; suddenly they have become the Satan’s follower. They become greedy because their wives are pushing them to bring more money home. Many of these guys become mentally and sexually frustrated because either their wives deny them sex in order to punish or tame them or after pregnancy their wives don’t bounce back to the pre-natal stage, all they do is talk about women and sex, they turn in sexual predators who are just waiting to pounce on any innocent unsuspecting girl, they discuss girls and sex everyday in office, work gets overshadowed. Because of lack of understanding in the marriage, a vacuum develops which brings in an emotional barrier, proper communication stops, and now that they have a child they don’t want to part ways, they have joint EMI’s to pay for everything they have purchased. And of course they have fears in them that what will happen if they separate?? How will parents feel?? What will the society say?? Will I be able cope as a single person again? How will I be able to live lonely??

I love being single because I want to live like a KING, you don’t need a million dollars to live like a king. I want to get up in the  morning, go for a long running/jogging session , come back, get ready for work, do the work I enjoy the most, return and go for swimming, have a nice dinner, read a book/watch a movie/or update myself something on my profession.

I want to achieve excellence in my field of work and keep myself fit, to achieve the fitness levels of athletes so that I can combat ageing. I want to travel, to go to places in India and abroad.

I accept the fact that I cannot handle the responsibility of a Marriage, of having a family life. At least I have the courage to accept my shortcomings, how many people have the ability to do so in this case??

I guess some people are jealous of single people, so they threaten you with the age old question ‘What will happen to you in old age’. My reply to such cynics is that I have plans for that and I will take care of myself.

I will life the life of adventure so that tomorrow when I go to my graveyard, I will not go with regret that I did not live my life.

Fanatic Obsession

DATE:25th April 2011

I wonder that does such a thing exist; I have seen that people have fanatic obsession towards something, some have it towards their profession, some have it towards their hobby, some are obsessed with glory, many are with Money and material aspects and of course there are religious fanatics whose obsession towards their religion causes destruction in this world.

But I wonder can someone be obsessed with a person, I mean really be so obsessed with a person that he/she shall not let it go.

I never thought that’s such thing existed until 72 hours ago, when the suddenly my life took a 360 degree turn.

I feel that at times some people come across something good, something so nice that they can’t let it go. They have been searching such a thing eternity when one day fate just made them come across it and they know they shall not find such a thing in future so they just want to cling to it and want to achieve it at any cost.

However this type obsession at times can be detrimental, because when dreams tear apart the life of these people is shattered.

Tuesday, April 19, 2011

Becoming a MAVEN and a Connector of Healthcare Quality

Yesterday I just finished reading the book called ‘The Tipping Point’ by Malcolm Gladwel. It mentioned a very important point that in the power of few lies the ability to spread a social epidemic of an amazing magnitude that would bring a radical change.

In that three people have the power, the first being the connectors, the second being the mavens and lastly the persuaders.

I aim too be the Connector and Maven of Healthcare Quality. Maven in Hebrew means a collector of items, a connoisseur and an expert. The maven has a knack to transform complex technical matters into simple lay mans language and present it to the general population so that they can understand. With this and combined with the ability to connect with others either as a person or through social online network, I believe in spreading the word of healthcare Quality.

Healthcare Quality is still in its neonatal stage in India, that neonatal stage which does not intend to grow up at all. The management of many Hospitals even today have a lackadaisical attitude towards healthcare Quality. For them it means nothing but a waste of Money.

The problem being very simple that Healthcare industry has its own share of miserly capitalist sharks who believe that Healthcare in a business(I don’t deny that) and think that they should be able to rake in maximum profits they can in a short period of time.

Patient Safety is the last thing in their mind; the life of the patient does not matter to them, even when the patient dies these creatures are more interested in getting money out of the dead.

At times I feel that these people have sold their souls to the devils and will feed on partially dying people as well.

The message of the need for Healthcare Quality and Patient safety is to be spread to the masses. The fact that every patient and his/her relative should be  aware of the different safety systems that the Hospitals need to have and take treatment according.

I believe that I will do it and the Hospital Owners will come to know about the need for Healthcare Quality, Patient Safety, Risk Assessment and Management, Occupational Safety and Environmental Safety.

Hopefully this social epidemic will spread.